How is your man doing?

How is your man doing? You’re working hard and looking forward to a retirement of leisure and possibly ticking off some of those bucket list items that you haven’t quite got round to. While it’s not everyone’s desire to go bungie jumping in New Zealand or go walking the foothills of the Himalayas, we all would like to think that we will have enough mental and physical capacity to see out the rest of our life after retirement. But men aren’t doing so well! Men are more likely to die prematurely or develop chronic disease because of their lifestyle choices.

So, why the question, “How is your Man doing?”

It’s simply because most men are not proactive about looking after their health and wellbeing. So, their health declines over years without them noticing. Coronary heart disease kills 1 in 8 men as opposed to 1 in 14 women[i]. In England, prostate cancer is now more common than breast cancer[ii]. It’s a staggering statistic that there are 4 times as many widows in their 80s than widowers[iii]! So, men need to be more aware of their health and take action to prevent life threatening chronic disease if they want to live a healthy life for as long as possible.

Be Health partners

couple dancing in the kitchen

Responsibility our health and wellbeing isn’t something that we can assign to someone else. But as a couple in relationship, we care about our partner, and working together for better health outcomes is a great way to be closer. Here is a checklist for couples where you can do to work together to improve the “odds” of a healthier life and answer the question, “how is my man doing?”

1. Food for health: ☑

As Garfield said, “diet is die with a t”, and most men hate the thought of anything associated with controlling what they eat or drink. Many think it’s normal have a bit of a belly from middle age onwards, but the belly keeps growing. Secretly, men know the risks of being overweight, but it goes on so slowly and we only notice when a Large becomes XL and then becomes XXL. The expanding waistline is an early indicator that some action is required. Your man may try a diet for a few weeks or months and may lose some weight quickly, then it’s back to the old habits and the cycle continues! The easiest way to improve your diet is to remove temptation and stop eating ultra processed meals and snacks. If there are biscuits or crisps in the cupboard, they get eaten, usually from boredom or habit. Ultra processed foods are high in salt, sugar, refined oils, and lack the fibre we need to help with digestion. By reducing processed foods and eating more fibre can have a profound effect on your general health. Take-away meals can be far worse, by being high in calories, unhealthy saturated fat, salt, and processed carbohydrates, while being low in fibre.

2. Activity for life: ☑

He plays sport, great! There’s no reason to give up, even into your 40s, 50s and even beyond. There’s always an activity, sport or exercise that we can do. I’ve played different sports over the years and adapted as I got older. I played volleyball and squash when I was in my 20s and 30s, martial arts in my 40s and 50s. Now in my 60s, I do 3 HIITs sessions a week, and I can’t see myself giving up doing some sort of exercise. But not everyone has a life of sport and activity to fall back on. So, developing an interest in an activity can be hard without motivation and inspiration. Activity and exercise don’t have to be a competitive sport or gym membership, it could be gardening, dancing, walking or many other things. You may need to start gently to build your up general fitness first, but it is possible. Contemplating on the sofa every evening after a sedentary day job will speed up your decline in health[iv]. So, give each other a proverbial kick and get moving.

3. Talk about health: ☑

Getting up once in the night for a wee when you’re over 40 is a fact of life for many. Getting up 2, 3 or more times in the night can be an indication that something isn’t right. But men hate going to the doctors especially about embarrassing things, but delay can only make things worse. If something doesn’t feel right, then you should get it checked and then there is no need to worry about what might be. Men that boast that they haven’t seen a doctor in the last decade isn’t a sign of good health, but a statement of denial. Talking to your loved one is not a sign of weakness, but one of strength. Dr Google tends to make us more worried, whereas a quick trip the GP can bring peace of mind. Both you and your partner are entitled to a free NHS Health check every 5 years once you’re over 40. Again, not only is it good prevention, it also provides piece of mind.

4. Do things together: ☑

While not every couple wants to “live out of each other’s pockets”, it is good for our health to do things together regularly. By spending quality time together, touching and intimacy, we will produce more of the “happy hormones” and lower anxiety[v], and will benefit our health. Life can be very busy many people end up exhibiting the symptoms of burnout, which tends to be seen as an occupational issue. But it can also happen from coping with home life. Couples in their 40s and 50s are not only stressed from work and long hours, but they can also be dealing with a combination of teenagers, empty nest, and ageing parents. So, finding time to do things together can be quite hard. But by doing things together couples can strengthen themselves and be more resilient to the stresses of life. Planning quality time together doesn’t just happen and needs to be planned. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be spontaneous.

5. Support each other’s sleep routine: ☑

Most people would agree that getting more sleep is desirable. Disrupted sleep is common and there are hundreds of products and supplements that are designed to help you get better sleep. The best way to improve sleep is not from supplements. It comes from working with your body’s clock and setting a routine that works you’re your body. There are also health benefits for couples from sleeping together such as production of the “happy hormones”, dopamine and oxytocin. Many middle-aged people suffer with sleep apnoea. Depending on the research, as many as twice as many men suffer from sleep apnoea than women[vi]. Sleep apnoea is often a result of the same lifestyle issues that cause diseases like heart disease or diabetes and certain cancers. Couples can have a huge impact on each other’s health and wellbeing by supporting good sleep.

How to change

Today we talk about whole person health, working on nutrition, activity, low stress and improved sleep. Changes to lifestyle can be overwhelming, especially when you feel like you’re fighting to keep your head above water. As a couple, talking about change can feel uncomfortable and challenging. You may feel more motivated than your partner to improve health when they can be locked in denial.

At Pure Body Fix® we can work with you individually and as a couple to support you as you make the changes to improve your health and wellbeing. We have programmes that are specifically for couples of all ages and stages in their relationship. Our approach is non-judgemental, and we help you find the answers that are already inside you. Nutrition and health coaching can be face to face or on Zoom at times that work for you. The coaching programme will be a mixture of individual and joint sessions where anything disclosed is in the strictest confidence.

You can book a FREE 20-minute discovery call and learn how Pure Body Fix® can help you be fitter, healthier and happier.